What happened...

Some background.. We learned in early February that we were pregnant with natural, fraternal triplets. Statistically we had everything going for us; the babies were conceived naturally, they were all in their own sac, they all had their own placenta, and I had already had a successful pregnancy. At 16 weeks they started baseline measurements for my cervix, which was measuring between 4-5 cm (anything over 3 is great). They would continue to measure every week to week and a half as that measurement was the indicator for going on bed rest.

As standard care for triplet pregnancy, my doctor told me to quit working by 20 weeks and prepare to be fairly sedentary for the duration. That was not a problem. I put myself on bed rest. My body was pumping three times the normal amount of blood and had a lot of babies to nourish. I was not able to even walk a block after 12 weeks or I would nearly pass out (quite a difference to my pregnancy with John when I was renovating and exercising up to the day I had him). But I didn't just slow down - I nearly stopped. I did not want to risk anything. This was it. This was our family in the making. With any luck I would not be pregnant again (my hormones were three times the normal level for pregnancy too so I couldn't bare to be so sick again). We were excited and amazed that this was really happening to us!

Making it to 23 weeks wasn't easy but the boys were doing great! They were thriving! They were measuring the size of a singleton babies of their same gestational age. Every time we looked at them on ultrasound they were super active and kicking each other. Aaron said it looked like a hot tub party with arms and legs all over the place. My cervix had not changed a bit but my uterus sure was growing. At my 19 week appointment I was measuring 34 weeks pregnant (40 is full term), by 21 weeks I was over 36 weeks pregnant and I imagine when I delivered on Monday my uterus was around 38 weeks pregnant. Triplets are born, on average, at 32 weeks gestation. We made it to just over 23 weeks. Viability is medically agreed upon to be 24 weeks. That was our next major milestone.

Last Monday night I ended up getting very sick in the night, vomiting and body aches. It knocked any bit of energy I had right out of me. I had Aaron take me in on Tuesday morning to get fluids. They gave me two liters of fluid and sent me home (dehydration is a major cause for preterm labor so I needed to stay hydrated. I was already needing to drink over a gallon of water a day to keep up with the babies). The rest of the day I didn't leave my bed, same thing on Wednesday. The nurses said there was a GI bug going around but it was typically lasting 24 hours. By Wednesday night I felt well enough to take a bath. Around 11pm I noticed I had leaked some fluid and it was time to head back in to get checked out.

A very simple test, called a fern test, is used to determine whether or not the fluid leaking is amniotic fluid. They just wipe it on a glass slide and when it dries it has a fern pattern. The doctors looked at my cervix - still over 4, phew. They said I was probably just a little crampy from my uterus now being nearly full term and that would likely continue the rest of the pregnancy. The doctors and nurses were sure the discharge I had was likely not amniotic because there wasn't any more of it and it seemed too thick. We realized once we got home we never got the results back from the fern test. It was 2 a.m. when we came home and had already had a long week. Aaron gets up at 4:30 so we just went to bed.

Friday I stayed home and rested. I so badly wanted to make the trip to Mankato with Aaron for Andrew's Memorial but I had not been able to ride in a car for any length since early May and I couldn't risk it now. Saturday I finally felt good again. Until Saturday night. I hadn't left the house all week (except for the hospital) so I decided to go with Aaron to get some groceries. As I walked about 20 feet to the front door I knew I wouldn't be able to walk the grocery aisles. So I used the MartCart (aka "rascals")! It was hilarious. I got a lot of looks but oh well. We zipped through the store and got what we needed. That night by 11pm I was having discharge again and my already rock hard belly started contracting. We were headed back to the hospital.

After a long night the resident came in and said "I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry." The tests we had done had determined I was in fact leaking amniotic fluid and for the first time my cervix had shortened to 2.7 cm (which was still totally fine). I'm not sure it really hit us even then what was about to happen. When I had John I roomed with a woman who had a leak and they kept her in the hospital until she delivered nearly two months later. I thought, okay, I can sit in the hospital for 8 weeks. I can stand on my head for 8 weeks if I have to. This will be okay.

Before we knew it they had a neonatologist come in to speak with us about the probability of our babies living if we delivered and what our options were. It started to hit me then. Soon the Maternal Fetal Medicine doc on call came to consult with us. I asked him what the chances were that I would start to go into labor. He said there was a 70-80% chance that labor would start within a week. What I heard was "there's a 20-30% chance labor will not start." I would play those odds anytime - for things I can actually control. This, however, was not my call but I was naturally optimistic. He said we could be admitted and wait or we could go home - where ever we would be most comfortable and least anxious. That was home.

Sunday we tried to get some rest after a long week and another night without much sleep. We slept most of the day and Aaron proceeded to make a planned family dinner for Father's Day with my dad, mom, brother, and his dad. I got off the couch to eat for about 10 minutes and shortly after started cramping. I laid there until about 10:30 pm and knew it was time to go in. This time I knew I was staying at the hospital, one way or another. (They were not concerned with me moving around - membranes do not rupture prematurely because of physical activity but because there is an infection or something else biologically causing them to do so - this is what happened with John as well. We thought it was a fluke but are now wondering if it's something else). When I went back in the cramps were getting worse but my cervix had not changed. We still were not sure we were in labor. There was plenty of fluid around the babies and the were doing wonderful.

It wasn't long before I was having very strong contractions. They admitted me into a labor room and had me lay flat on the bed - no getting up - at all. We decided to start an aggressive antibiotic and fluid therapy to get the contractions to stop. If I could just get them to stop my cervix was still fine.

I was on a narcotic drip all night. It was enough to take the edge off but laboring flat on your back for 12 hours with three babies inside is tough. Really, really tough. I knew these contractions were too strong to not have an effect on my cervix. We met with the neonatologist again to make a plan (more on that later) if I did in fact deliver these babies. We were all cautiously optimistic that we could get the contractions to stop. I had a scheduled 7:30 am ultrasound and consult with my MFM doc. The plan was to check my cervix again to see if it was changing. If not, I was going to be wheeled up to my appointment. They didn't want to check too frequently because they feared introducing infection. The doctor checked me around 6:40 and immediately said, "I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry. I see the sac of baby A and you're dilated to 6." Just then the baby dropped and I need to push. They told me to hold off pushing (that's hard to do) until we got in the room. Good thing Aaron's a pro at changing into scrubs - he had about 30 seconds and we were literally running into the room with everyone trying to get their gloves on quick enough. Seconds later, baby A, Charlie was born. He had a faint cry and was put into our arms. We didn't know how long we had with him so I baptized him. He was with us for two hours while we laid there waiting.

The plan was to deliver A and then wait to see if labor could be stopped. There are cases where one twin is delivered and then the uterus stops contracting enough to keep the other baby in for several weeks. We were going to wait for an hour. If the contractions went away they would stitch my cervix and I would try and get the other two further along. For about 40 minutes it seemed as though this may be an option. Then the contractions kicked up again. I labored holding Charlie for 4 more hours as the other two lowered in the uterus. Our deacon was with us during the next few hours and was ready to baptize the other boys.

Baby B, Cal, was next to come. He was breech. Within five minutes, Baby C, Harry had arrived as well. By this time our family members were at the hospital. We were wheeled back with the babies, Harry still alive, so they would get a chance to see and hold our beautiful boys.

The boys stayed with us, wrapped in their receiving blankets for the rest of the day. They were put in a bassinet together and stayed with us in our room until morning. It was a precious experience. They looked so perfect. They looked like their brother John. They were all so, so beautiful.

That is what happened. There are more posts I will make about our decisions and all the wonderful people that helped us out that day and the agony of what we're experiencing.

I'm writing this blog for information but also for our healing and for helping others who may be going through the same thing. I followed a lot of triplet blogs during my pregnancy and they were unbelievable helpful in knowing someone else had walked in my same shoes.

Aaron and I now know there are a lot of people who have experienced the loss of a child. If anything, we have learned there are too many. On Monday we didn't just lose our boys, we lost our reality, we lost our future as we had been preparing, and we lost a lot of dreams we had. I know we will be fine. We are surrounded by love and so thankful for that. Life will go on and as Father Nick says, we will learn to walk with a limp.